I often find that when it is confusing though, it is largely because I am making it confusing. There is usually a missing piece that I am overlooking and that tends to account for most if not all of my thinking errors. I've mentioned before that human beings are really no different from other animals is most respects. I heard it said recently (If I find the source I will cite it) that the biggest difference between humans and animals is that we have an understanding of our own mortality and animals do not. I think that this is an interesting thought but I am not sure I can agree with it entirely for a couple of reasons. For one thing, I am not sure that we can say for certain the method by which beings other than ourselves come to conclusions about such things. For instance, if a Bear knows that someday it will die of starvation, violence or old age, the obvious instinct would be to die of old age. That doesn't mean that the Bear has no sense of it's own mortality, it simply means that the Bear is trying to live as long as possible. So, in essence, I think that it is more likely that the Bear more completely understands and accepts it's own mortality as opposed to being afraid of it which is the tendency in humans.
Again, as much as I identify with other beings in the natural world, especially bears, that does not mean that I exactly think as a Bear so I am not going to pretend I have the answer. The bottom line is that it is pretty clear that other beings have different cognitive methods than we do and to assume that they are unaware of the fact they are going to die someday presupposes that if they did, they would be afraid which also presupposes that this cognitive aspect is unique to humans. I would say that is a pretty sweeping assumption. My assumption may be considered by some to be just as sweeping but I still consider it more plausible.
This difference in cognition between ourselves and other beings though, is a big part of what Druidry is about for me. Each different species has different manners of viewing the world. Certainly the Lion has a different understanding of the world than the Gazelle does, as I am sure that the Oak and the Fern do as well. Understanding that these differences exist is a part of what draws me to this spiritual path, it is a way of respecting all other beings on their own terms and not on human terms. Building a relationship with another being, spiritually or otherwise, means that you have to accept that their perceptions will be different from yours and learn to appreciate that, especially when another being creates boundaries that it does not wish you to cross.
Trying to blend our edges with another being to create relationship is easier when we don't understand that being entirely. This is, in large part, because we have no expectation of what that relationship will be like. I can remember many times in my younger years approaching women in bars with the aim of trying to get them to come home with me or at least get a number and take them out. My aim was never to create a relationship that was open ended, my intentions were very clear. I am sure that I would have had greater success had I simply left it open. When you come in with predetermined goals in mind beyond simply creating relationship, the being with whom you are trying to do so may wish to refuse. Refusal is about trust. People who have goals in creating relationship are not focused on the relationship itself, they are focused on getting their own needs or desires met. Creating a connection with a tree, for example, is easier for me at times than blending edges with another human being. A tree knows that it is a tree and being a tree is the focus of it's existence. It is not concerned with trying to look like a tree or act like a tree. Human beings tend to complicate themselves by feeling one way and acting another, as I did when I approached women. I acted like it was no big deal but I had ulterior motives and they knew that. With other human beings, sometimes the hardest guesswork is your own guesswork. I think that the real difference between us and most of the other beings we share the Earth with is that human beings are capable of lying to themselves to justify what they are doing. This is a subtle shift in perception on the grand scale but has an indelible impact upon how we interact with other beings. I doubt that the fox ever lies to itself about why it hunts mice under the Winter snow. To me, I feel it is important to question what you hope to get out of a relationship. If the hope is a gain for you and a loss for them then the blending of edges cannot be honorable or honest. If the communication becomes laced with venom in an attempt to hurt one another, then it is time to respect that relationship for what it is and walk away or attempt to establish better rapport. The unfortunate part of human relationships is that this requires honesty with yourself first and I find that most human beings lack that level of self awareness. As in my last post, finding that honesty is about entering the darkness of yourself and coming to terms with it. That is honest self awareness. The tree does not lie to itself about being a tree but human beings lie to themselves constantly about their own motives, experience and humanity.
This morning, I went outside with my wife and son and we played in the snow a bit. Well, they played...I looked at the garage and realized I need to clean it out to get the cars in. We went out into the woods to look at our ritual space and as we were coming back I noticed how small my son's footsteps are in the snow compared to my own. This gave me a wonderful spot of inspiration. He is new in the world and I thought about how this was a good lesson in Nature for me to remember. Right now, my footsteps are small in the world as I begin the journey towards becoming a Druid. As I grow, so too will my footsteps and so too will his. I may have some wild opinions and I can be very opinionated about things but I seek to cause no harm to others that is not due them and I can only lead by example. Sometimes I fall short of this because I can over complicate things. Something that people tend to forget when they seek to blend their edges with another is that the complications they find in those relationships may be their own. I am a human being having a human experience. I am not trying to be a Bear, Bear just speaks to me. It is my spiritual beliefs that give me a connection to the world around me in a positive way. I won't apologize for that, I won't make excuses for it. If you don't like it then you don't have to associate with me. This is hard for some folks to understand even though I wish them to understand it. When I am in communion with the green Earth though, I feel known and valued. Another reminder that those who know me best are not necessarily those who have known me longest...something Nature taught me.
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